I’ve talked A LOT about routine and how important I’ve realised it is in managing my anxiety. It keeps me feeling organised, grounded and increases my resilience to then deal with the chaos when it inevitably comes. Because that’s life right?
The problem for me was that I’d set myself up for failure and inevitably increased my anxiety. Why? Because my routine was NOT transferrable between locations at all.
I’m very fortunate that working for myself means that I have a lot of freedom in how I spend my time and structure my day.
My routine was:
Morning yoga
F45
Then an ocean swim, ideally a surf.
It was/is amazing, and definitely sets me up to feel great for the rest of the day. A healthy dose of physical activity, a rush of endorphins and being immersed in nature. What more could one ask for?
But then what happens if I need or want to meet someone at a time in conflict with my scheduled classes? What if my body is too sore? Or I’m injured in a way that means I can’t do my usual exercise? What if I just actually need to be in Brisbane helping out my sister in law with her new twins [something I want to do, and am so excited for]. But how do I keep on top on MY self-care, so I can be there for others too?
You see my problem right?
So I needed something else… something a little smaller. Something that I could do everyday, anywhere, anytime. That would set up my day with intention, create space for reflection, creativity and just… space.
I’ve listened to a lot of different podcasts from top performers in all different areas – mainly on the Tim Ferris Show. So many had talked about meditation, journaling/gratitude journaling. But admittedly it was something I could never imagine myself getting on board with.
The meditation part I did, somewhat regularly, but hadn’t cemented it into a regular time during my day. Hence it VERY frequently got forgotten about all together.
But journaling – I couldn’t the see value in my life. How to make it relevant and useful in my life now. Given as a teenager I poured my soul out onto pages and pages. The stuff I was writing after finishing school in my “gap” year that was more “I really just don’t know what the fuck to do with my life and fear I will never amount to anything” year is particularly tragic. I tear up reading them now as I feel how hurt and lost I was and wish I could have only known what good was ahead of me.
But alas, now. How did I take this tool, that so many people rave about and it not just be me pouring my emotions out [not to say that is useful].
After listening to the Tim Ferris ‘Morning Routine’ radio hour, I decided to give his way a go.
So I’m going to break down my new morning routine which, as I said in my January monthly wrap up, has been SUCH a game changer in how I’m feeling day to day. I wanted to share it, on the off chance any of you find it helpful too!
I do this every morning [just hit my 30 day mark so helloooooo new habit]. It takes me around 30mins total, and I specifically wake up that 30mins earlier to create time for it, before I need to be at any of my other commitments [i.e. yoga, meetings, social hangs].
SOME KEY THINGS.
Before I break down the specifics, I wanted to cover a couple of the key elements of this morning routine. Again with the goal create space in my mind, take some time with myself before the daily hustle begins.
Limit Screen Time.
My goal [and man it has been hard to change such a default behaviour] is to limit my screen time until AFTER my morning routine is done, and usually until after my morning exercise.
No social media, no emails, no banking.
Nothing with alerts. Nothing that begins the panic mode in my brain that makes me think I need to do anything else RIGHT NOW.
Of course my meditation app is on my phone, and I usually play some music while I journal. But other than that, I do not check anything else on my phone.
And wow. I feel SUCH a difference already in not immediately filling my mind with stuff. The mornings when I haven’t honoured this [old habits die hard right], I really notice a heavier feeling in my mind and generally a more agitated mood.
Noble Silence.
Basically a yogic way of saying not speaking. Until my morning routine is complete, I don’t talk to anyone. My husband knows to honour this. It’s basically again just preserving that space and clarity in the mind. Being present in the moment and with yourself, for just a little while.
WAKE UP… PROPERLY.
I find the prospect of waking up and then sitting straight down to meditate SO difficult. So first things first, I want to shock my body into a more awake state. How I wish I had a cold plunge pool at my house like Tony Robbins, but I make do with either a cold shower [which also has other great health benefits], or even just cleansing my face and brushing my teeth. It’s just enough to snap me out of that groggy feeling [if I have one at all, depending on how I’ve slept].
I also use the Sleep Cycle alarm. I’m not sure how accurate it is, but the idea is the alarm wakes you up at the most ideal time within a 30min window of when you actually need to be up. I’ve personally found this a much more gentle alarm than the standard phone one.
Side note –
I’ve also been looking into sun alarms, as I love the prospect of a gentle wake up that is more in sync with how our bodies are supposed to wake up – i.e. in rising with the sun. So if anyone has used one, please let me know if you love it.
MEDITATE.
I personally use the Headspace app. This isn’t sponsored in anyway, I’ve always paid for it with my own money. Other people speak positively about Calm or other things as well, but I haven’t tried these myself. At the moment I’m doing a 10 minute meditation, but will probably soon up this to 15min and maybe eventually 20mins. But of course, if you’re just trying meditation for the first time, I would recommend starting small – just 5 mins.
Another aspect I really like about Headspace is that it has a bunch of different themed courses. Each are slightly tailored to focus on an area you might want to work on i.e. creativity, managing anxiety, mindful eating, self esteem.
I’ve found such positive benefits from not only sitting down for this practice everyday. But more than the actual 10 minute practice, doing this everyday has helped me to use these learned skills as tool when I’m having a bad day or am feeling anxious/unsettled.
JOURNALLING & GRATITUDE.
Now your journaling practice could take on whatever form makes sense for you. For me I do 3 things, and it’s generally never more than 2 -3 pages.
General Thoughts.
I take a few moments to write down my general thoughts. I might be how I’m feeling, it might be some thoughts that have been weighing on my mind. It might be acknowledging that I didn’t sleep well and feel less than my usual self. Sometimes it’s a more philosophical concept I’m grappling with and am jotting down questions and thoughts around that idea.
Intentions/Actions.
These are more actionable thoughts and ideas I want to focus on that day, or in my life more generally.
I try to jot down a few intentions. Sometimes they are simple “meditate twice today” and sometimes they are more specific “listen to podcasts instead of watching a TV show, if I feel a lull in my productivity”.
Some other examples of my intentions:
-EAT SLOWLY & MORE MINDFULLY – not to eat less as a goal, but to enjoy the food, savour it, and reduce the chance of overeating.
-Set aside 2 x 1hr blocks without phone to brainstorm and allow creativity to flow without interruption
-Be present – REDUCE SCREEN TIME on days when Tom isn’t working – aim for 1 HR SOCIAL MEDIA TIME!
-Be clear of expectations, intentions and expressing feelings and boundaries with family [to protect relationships and self]
The goal here for me is to be specific. To have clear intentions and ideally actionable things from those intentions. It is about cementing things that I want to work towards and change in my life.
I’m also in the process of transferring these all across and listing them in a word document so that I can easily access and refresh myself on them whenever I want.
Gratitude.
The final part of my journaling, is to write 3 things I am grateful for and why. I’ve shared a bit now about myself now [read more about that here], and so I doubt it will come to a surprise to you that I naturally have a more negative temperament than maybe other people. It is the way I’m wired and thats okay. But I think in general, it’s true to say that most of us tend to more easily notice the “bad” things in our life than the good things. So practising gratitude, is a way to try to mitigate our natural tendency to focus on the less-than-spectacular parts of our life.
I always try to include one simple thing i.e. rain, a cool breeze, water, my arm. And I try not to let myself repeat myself too frequently unless there is a specific reason to be grateful for that thing or person today. Like I could take the easy route and express gratitude for my husband daily, because I am. He is amazing. But the beauty of this practice is really having to think about ALL the good things around you. Think about and notice the big and small things.
I hope by now some of you have listened to the podcast I recommended on gratitude in my January monthly wrap up [here it is again], so you can hear some of the benefits of practising gratitude in your life. In the podcast A.J. Jacobs talks about his latest book where he travels the world in order to thank every single person involved in bringing him his morning cup of coffee [so if you’re ever stuck on what to be grateful for… think about that].
READ SOMETHING… INSPIRING.
Most mornings, not all mornings, I also like to take this time to read something inspiring or thought provoking. Like poetry, a quote or a short article. Just something short. It’s not so much about how much I’m reading, but more about being intentional with what I what to put into my mind first thing in the day.
Lately I’ve been loving reading a random page of poetry from Rupi Kaur. Or a word from Consolations by David Whyte. Or even a short article from my Womankind or Tom’s New Philosopher magazines.
ADDED EXTRA: MOVE YOUR BODY.
Now I generally always go on from here to do yoga or F45 or something. But my routine is no longer centred on exercise. If my body is tired, or I’m time poor I even just simply do some stretches and a couple of sun salutations just to loosen up my body before starting my day.
I really hope you try some of these things in your own life. I’m only one month in and am already feeling a shift in my life.
And of course, let me know if you do and if it helps you in anyway. Would also love to hear what some of you do for your morning routine, or what your journal practice looks like.
Thank you for sharing this Karissa 💫 from South Africa x