THE HIGHLIGHTS
Finally returning to health after a solid 3 weeks of sickness! Coffee date + podcast/book club with my husband on a weekly basis. Mixing up my eating habits (playing around with eating higher protein & lower carb) and feeling some positive changes in my body!
Soaking up our gentle winter here in Byron – surfing as much as possible, reading in the sunshine. Catching up with friends I hadn’t seen in months! Challenging myself creatively through music, painting and ceramics. Meditating by the ocean every week.
THE NOT-SO-HIGHLIGHTS
The solid 3 weeks of sickness, coughing to the point of gagging and respectfully avoiding seeing my baby nephews and nieces (torture) in order to protect their vulnerable little immune systems. Even more, not-so-fun was the sickness following on from a solid 10 days of chest pain/tightness caused by my anxiety but many doctors appointments and eventual ED visit to ensure there wasn’t anything more sinister going on.
Anxiety… in general. Having one of the worst panic attacks I think I’ve ever had a couple of weekends ago, also getting in the way of an enjoyable day spent with my lover.
My little fluff ball getting a paralysis tick and giving me a fright! Thankfully pulled through a-okay!
THIS MONTH’S GAMECHANGER
Okay so truth be told, we’ve actually be doing this for the last couple of months. But seeing as I haven’t done my monthly update since February, I thought I would share now.
As mentioned above, Tom and I have been having weekly coffee dates for some time now. But we’ve added a new element to encourage deep conversation and growth. Each week choose one podcast that we will both listen to (separately whilst driving) and then we meet up to talk about it. Our thoughts, what we liked, what challenged us, what resonated with us. At the moment we are doing a chapter of a book a week – Tom is doing the audio book as he works late and hasn’t had a lot of time to read lately.
I think anyone who has been in a long term relationship can appreciate how easy it is to slip into autopilot and live life in parallel with your partner without actually pausing and creating space for quality time.
Creating a ritual around our coffee dates has made us take time for each other. To be more present, and to have deeper and more meaningful conversations.
It’s quickly become our FAVOURITE part of the week.
It’s definitely something you could do with a friend as well. Just a new way to learn, expand your knowledge and perception of things, reflect and grow.
LEARN
I shared on my IG stories a few weeks back that I have started learning electric guitar. I actually played acoustic guitar and sang for years when I was younger and then stopped. Then I stopped after being burnt out by the HSC exams and a stint in a Talent Development Program which crushed my confidence. So now I am trying to reconnect with this passion and side of myself that has lay dormant for 6 or more years. And to try and come into it with NO EXPECTATIONS and a beginners mind.
I really want to encourage people to try and find a way to connect with a lost passion or maybe learn something completely new. To switch off Netflix sometimes, and put some energy into learning a new skill or exploring a creative outlet.
LISTEN
We have been on an absolute Esther Perel binge lately. She is just so incredible and challenges so many of our misinformed beliefs about relationship, sex, marriage, expectations, desire. It’s so powerful and I highly encourage EVERYONE to delve into her stuff
Here is what I’ve listened to lately.
Tim Ferris Show episode #241: The Relationship Episode: Sex, Love, Polyamory, Marriage, and More (with Esther Perel)
Tim Ferris Show episode #271: Intimacy, Emotional Baggage, Relationship Longevity, and More – Esther Perel
Armchair Expert – Experts on Expert with Esther Perel
Where Should We Begin
This is Esther’s own podcast/audible audio series. It’s a one off therapy session with a real-life couple. It is SO interesting – it basically plays out like a crime show as you hear how Esther dives in and unpacks the issue. And in EVERY episode there is something you can learn and apply to your own relationship, no matter how different the couple’s situation is.
This talk on youtube – plus she also has two TED talks that I highly recommend.
Aside from Esther Perel-
School of Greatness episode 452: Mel Robbins: The 5 Second Rule to Change Your Life.
Don’t let the title put you off, it sounds gimmicky and I almost didn’t listen. Thankfully I trust my brother’s opinion, who was the one who shared it with me. It was a really interesting podcast and has a really practical, simple tool for you to try actioning in your life!
READ
I wasn’t lying when I said we’ve been on an Esther Perel binge, so we are now currently reading her first book – Mating in Captivity.
Again just an incredibly interesting book challenging our ideas of love, intimacy, desire, expectations of our partner. We are only 4 chapters in and it’s been EYE OPENING.
I can’t recommend Esther Perel enough whether you are in a relationship or not! This also isn’t sometihng to read only if you are having “relationship issues”. Tom and I are solid and growing closer everyday. But I am a firm believer in personal growth across all aspects of life. And of working on to understand your relationship and start conversations BEFORE there are “problems”
THINGS I’M LOVING RIGHT NOW:
IMBIBE BEAUTY RENEWAL
I don’t like to share anything I haven’t tried and tested myself for at least a few months. I’ve been using this probiotic everyday for a few months and have been loving it. It tastes amazing (which is also helpful in just trying to increase your daily water intake). In addition, probiotics are SO good for gut health. I’ve been doing a number of things for my skin lately, but this has been another part of my daily ritual that is compounding the effects and giving me the best skin I’ve ever had. In addition to this being just an incredible product, I love supporting brands that have heart behind them. Felicity, the foundress of Imbibe, is so incredibly passionate about women’s health, gut health. She initially started making this probiotic for herself, fermenting in her bathtub! Highly recommend giving the Beauty Renewal a try!
NOISE CANCELLING HEADPHONES
I got these back in December and have loved them ever since, however especially now that I’m working in an office space 1-2 days a week. I find it SO valuable being able to tune out the background noise and get in the zone. People always ask me which ones I bought, so thought I’d share here because my research-nut husband looked into the best value for money and these were it! They are the Sony WH-1000XM3. I can attest that people literally have to tap me on the shoulder to get my attention cause I can’t hear anything.
I’ve also started using them all the time when working at home by myself. It acts as of cue for my body to think “okay, it’s work time” and have found it a lot easier to maintain focus.